Stop creating your pain NOW

Many of us have been in situations in our lives which have been less than desirable. You may have experienced a violent or neglectful childhood, bullying at school, a violent adult relationship, a marriage breakup, an accident, loss of a loved one or loss of financial security.

As you would expect, all of these situations and many more can dramatically affect the direction your life takes. They can cause trauma, stress and low self-esteem, and can completely derail you and your life.

Over the years, it has fascinated me to see people who have endured the toughest of times get up, dust themselves off, learn from their experiences and create a new life—and others who completely derail and fall into the depths of despair and depression.

I have discovered that there is one major difference between these two types of people. The difference is that some people choose to stay stuck in and be defined by their stories and others choose to create new stories. It is not the events in our lives that affect us, it is the decisions we make about the events in our lives that do.

Those who choose to stay stuck in their stories greatly limit their capacity to live a healthy and happy life, and those who create new stories grow beyond their wildest dreams.

In any given moment, if you are replaying a story from the past that is no longer happening in the present, you are giving it new life, energising it and keeping it alive.

You are creating your pain by staying stuck in your story.

We have all blamed someone in our life for the things that have happened to us – but when you blame someone else, you make them responsible for what is going on in your life. If things had gone the way you wanted them to, would life have really been better? Would you be the person you are today?

Life is a balance – when you are in pain it’s because you are overvaluing the impact an event had on the negative side of your life and undervaluing the impact on the positive side. The truth is that life doesn’t happen to us – it happens for us so it’s only fair to blame effectively. If you are going to blame someone you need to blame them for the bad and the good that came as a result of the situation – blame consciously instead of unconsciously.

Join me on our Facebook Live chat this Thursday at 1pm EST to find out more



Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *